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Advice for Subsequent Therapists—from a Colleague Who Learned the Hard Way
This essay by a now-retired psychoanalytic psychiatrist describes her experience of being emotionally and
sexually exploited by her prominent and powerful training analyst, the reaction of her colleagues, and how she sought and found help. To view this essay, click here.
Breaking Away
Because relationships with abusive psychotherapists often bear the characteristics of addiction to the abusive relationship, Stockholm Syndrome, and other signs of victims having been groomed to be caretakers of their abusers, it can be extremely difficult for victims to distance themselves from their abusers. This essay describes how one victim finally broke those chains. To view this essay, click here
Finding and Working with a New Therapist After Abuse
Knowledgeable and competent subsequent treaters often play critical roles in helping victims of
abuse and exploitation by psychotherapists heal and move on. Following an abusive experience,
many victims find it difficult to trust that a therapist will not replicate the behavior of the
abuser and also may not understand what constitutes appropriate therapy. Three authors explain: what
to look for in a subsequent treater; why trusting a new therapist may be both difficult and, as one
of the author's suggests, perhaps not necessary; and what victims may experience while examining their
relationships to their abusive therapist with a new therapist.
To view these essays Click Here
Forensic Experts and Their Role in Cases of Therapy Abuse
Written by a retired psychiatrist who served as a forensic expert in over 200 cases requiring psychological assessments, this essay describes how and why a forensic expert is used when victims pursue claims against their abusers. The essay includes a description of the kinds of questions a forensic expert might ask a victim and a sample report describing the damage that has been inflicted that such an expert would supply to an attorney and the court. To view this essay, Click here
Forgiveness
While some cultural and religious traditions claim that healing comes through the act of forgiving those who harm us, this author suggests that such forgiveness may be misdirected. Because much of the damage done to us results in feelings of shame and responsibility for what took place, ultimately relief comes when we recognize that the most important person to forgive is ourself. To view this essay, Click here
Gag Orders
The first two essays on this topic are descriptions by victims/survivors of their feelings about having settled civil cases against abusers where the settlements prohibited them from speaking about their abuse. To view these essays, click here. The third essay on this topic, written by two Boston attorneys, argues that gag orders run counter to public policy and, accordingly, courts should refuse to enforce them. To view this essay, Click here.
Grooming
In this essay, the author describes being lulled into an exploitative relationship by a therapist whose "homelike" office was an integral part
and partner of his grooming strategies. To view this essay, click here
Guilt
The first essay under this topic describes how abusers try to shift the blame for their behavior to their victims. The second essay explains the differences between shame and guilt and how each plays into silencing victims and holding them in place. To view these essays, click here.
Healing
How do I Recover? In a comprehensive essay, a TELL Responder gives extensive and specific suggestions for taking back our lives and recovering from the damage that has been done to us. To view this essay, click here
Some of the struggles victims face as they strive to become survivors, and a look at some of the strengths that victims/survivors find through the long process of healing. To view the essays on this topic, click here.
How and Why Did This Happen to Me?
Written by a prominent medical writer and author of the book In Session: The Bond Between Women
and Their Therapists, in which she explores the dynamics that tie patients to their
therapists and make them vulnerable, this essay describes many of the reasons that
even sophisticated, well-educated, and highly successful people may fall prey to
manipulative and abusive psychotherapists-not because of any personal defect but
rather as a result of bringing absolutely normal longings into the therapy room.
To view this essay click here.
How to Choose a Lawyer After Your Therapist Has Exploited You
For most civil suits against abusing psychotherapists, it will be necessary to hire a lawyer, but few lawyers understand the nuances and limitations of such legal work. This essay details how to go about finding a lawyer who is both willing and able to take on your case. To view this essay, click here. Keeping the Secret
This essay describes what can happen when a victim fails to deal with having been abused and ignores the long-term implications of doing nothing. To view this essay, click here.
Lawyers
How to find and work with experienced lawyers when pursuing a civil case against an abusing psychotherapist. To view this essay, click here
Letting Go
Two of these three essays are letters by victims who sought closure to this abusive period of their lives by writing to their perpetrators. One letter was never sent: The other was sent but did not receive a response. The third, an essay, gives hope that it is possible to let go and move on. To view the essays on this topic, click here.
Letter to a Husband
While this essay is entitled “Letter to a Husband," it is truly a must-read for all victims, primary and extended, spouses, significant others, family, friends, and subsequent treaters. Because even primary victims are often confused by the feelings promulgated by this kind of exploitation, Letter to a Husband helps all understand the dangerous and painful shame, self-blame, and even the pathological attachment to the illusion of “the savior.” To view this essay, click here.
Licensing Board Complaints
This essay, Licensing Board Complaints: Tips for Those Considering Whether to Report, lays out in detail what victims should think about and know when making a decision to report an abuser to a licensing board. It is a must-read for anyone who wants to know what the benefits and possible pitfalls may be of taking such action and what realistic expectations might be. To view this essay, click here.
Male Survivors
These essays suggest that male survivors, perhaps especially those who have been victims of female abusers or male-male abuse, experience not only the same traumatic effects of abuse as females but may encounter additional problems in their attempts to be heard and validated. To view these essays, click here.
My Story is Different
Most who contact TELL believe that their situations are different than other victims. While every story is unique, recognizing what victims experience in common is often an early part of healing. To view this essay, click here.
Psychological Kidnapping
This essay applies the terms "psychological kidnapping" and "brainwashing" to some of the ways that victims of abuse by psychotherapists become taken over and controlled by their abusers and their personal powers and sense of self are undermined. To view this essay, click here, click here.
Reclaiming Our Reality
In May 2022, TELL Responder Bernadine Fox was named winner in the Mental Health Category of the "Courage to Come Back" awards given
by The Coast Mental Health Foundation in Vancouver, British Columbia, Canada. This essay is a brief segment
of her acceptance speech. To see more about Bernadine's history, why she received the award, and the rest of her acceptance speech,
see https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ccrk17dQ-TI To view this essay, Click Here
Shock and After-Shocks: A Husband's Story
This essay details a husband's reaction to learning that his wife was exploited by a health care professional and describes the first seven months of his healing process in terms of the stages of grief. To view this essay, click here.
Statements to the Courts
The first statement in this topic is by a victim, also a TELL Responder, who describe in detail to the judge the damage done to her and her family by the abuse.The second statement, by a subsequent treater, describes the damage done to the patient and the treatment issues that have been confronted as a result. To view these statements, click here.
Taking Action: A Success Story
The story of a victim who thoroughly explored her options and successfully pursued multiple courses of action against her abuser. She suggests that her greatest rewards came from personal growth and taking back her life and personal power through the process of taking action rather than from institutional rewards. To view this essay, click here.
Therapy Abuse: What Is It?
Many people who write to TELL ask whether they have been victims of abuse by therapists or whether what was done to them was just a mistake or misguided treatment. This essay, written by a leading advocate for consumer education and safe therapy, explains, in thoughtful detail, the elements and stages of abusive treatment and makes clear that abusive therapy involves exploitation in service of abusing therapists' needs and not the therapeutic needs of
their clients/patient. To view this essay, click here
Vulnerability
Some of the social, psychological, and developmental factors that make a person susceptible to exploitation and abuse. To view this essay, click here.
What is Therapy?
The first essay under this Topic, Psychotherapy: The Good, The Bad, and The Dangerous, is a listing of what should, may, and absolutely should not happen in therapy. The second essay, Danger Signs, describes some of the red flags that signal unhealthy boundaries in the therapist-patient relationship and that the therapy is in dangerous territory or headed there. To view these essays, click here.
Writing a Licensing Board Complaint
A victim who prevailed in her licensing board complaint, as well as in her civil and ethics committee complaints, shares the actual statement she wrote (names changed for confidentiality) and submitted. (See also "Focus on the Facts: My Experience Writing a Licensing Board Complaint" under "Papers" on this site.) To view the statement, click here.
Why Consent is Never a Valid Defense for Perpetrators
Written by a group of TELL Founders,
this statement explains why perpetrators can never legitimately argue that the victim freely consented to being abused-and why victims should never blame themselves for what took place. To view this essay, click here..
Authors
Corina Alexe (a pen name used because the case is still under investigation) is a Romanian artist and instructional designer.
She is open to hearing from other therapy abuse victims
from Romania and can be reached at: stopabuzterapeutic@gmail.com
James C. Beck, M.D., Ph.D. is a Professor of Psychiatry at Harvard Medical School and a senior psychiatrist in the Cambridge Health Alliance Psychiatry Department. His recent book, Psychiatry in Trouble, traces the evolution of psychiatry over his nearly six decades of practice.
"Burt Cooper" is a public affairs consultant specializing in politics and government. He has two daughters in their late teens. At his wife's request, he is using a pseudonym.
Nancy Daley holds a Master of Library Science degree and has worked in the information industry, public libraries, and school libraries. She is a volunteer TELL Responder.
Edward S. Flores is a Production Engineer in an aerospace company. He has been happily married for 26 years and has two adult daughters. Prior to his wife's abuse by a mental health professional, he, like most people, had very little if any understanding of such abuse.
Bernadine Fox is the host of Both Sides Now on Vancouver Coop Radio and the author of Coming to Voice: Surviving an Abusive Therapist. She is also a TELL responder.
Stephen Johnson, a 28 year old Marine Corps veteran, was a Mortarman who worked with a small squad in which he honed both his mechanical and teamwork skills. He holds a degree in journalism from Oakland University in Rochester, Michigan.
Linda Mabus Jorgenson is an attorney who has handled more than 300 cases involving sexual misconduct by therapists or other professionals.
S. Kim, Ph.D. is a psychologist in private practice.
Susan Kerman, M.D. is a psychiatrist in private practice In Dobbs Ferry, New York. She treats children, adolescents and adults.
Anton O. Kris, M.D. was a Training and Supervising Analyst at The Boston Psychoanalytic Society and Institute. He was also Clinical Professor of Psychiatry at Harvard Medical School.
Sadly He died in 2021
Deborah A. Lott is a medical writer, journalist, editor, faculty member at Antioch University
in Los Angeles, a TELL Responder, and author of the book In Session: The Bond Between Women and
Their Therapists. Her work has been named as Notable Essays of the Year in Best American
Essays and has been nominated for a Pushcart Prize.She is also the author of the memoir, Don't Go Crazy Without Me.
Michele Mauger was a Practice Manager/Administrator, working in general practice, forensic psychiatry, sexual health and HIV in the UK.
Carrie Meade spent her professional life in advertising. She has been a TELL Responder; has lectured and written on therapy abuse; is currently a student of psychology, writing and Buddhism;
and is an active advocate for animal rights, volunteering with non-profit organizations in Puerto Rico
dedicated to the rescue and rehoming of street dogs.
Andrew C. Meyer, Jr. is a medical malpractice attorney and founding partner of the law firm of Lubin & Meyer, P.C. in Boston.
Wanda S. Needleman, M.D. is a retired psychiatrist and psychoanalyst. She is also a volunteer TELL responder.
Marilyn Nowak works in human resources staffing for a major healthcare company that manufactures and distributes medical products and services.
Dr. Susan Penfold was Professor Emeritus of the Division of Child Psychiatry, Department of Psychiatry UBC and BC’s Children’s Hospital.
Deborah Petersen, BA., BSW, AHPRA (psych) AASW, is a psychoanalytic psychologist in Australia and a TELL responder.
Katie holds a degree in Early Childhood Education and teaches PreK. She lives with her husband and son.
Ilana W. Rosen, MSW, is a social worker in private practice in Spring Valley, New York.
Adam R. Satin is a Boston attorney specializing in medical malpractice and general liability litigation. He is an associate with the firm of Lubin & Meyer, P.C.
Erin Stevens is a counsellor/psychotherapist in Yorkshire, UK where she specialises in working with people who have experienced harm in therapy. She writes, speaks and trains therapists on boundary issues and is currently writing "Harm in Therapy: An Introduction for Counsellors and Psychotherapists" for PCCS books. She can be reached at: https://www.twitter.com/aclientfirst
Nicole Todd lives in Utah and is a stay-at-home mom of four children. She graduated summa cum laude with a BA in Economics from Hunter College, and also earned an MBA from Rutgers University. She is a TELL responder.
Janice Williams is a British Columbia-based artist, author, and organizer of "spoken word" and other community events.
John D. Winer is an attorney practicing in California and lead author of Proving Mental and Emotional Injuries, which focuses heavily on therapist sexual abuse cases.
Jan Wohlberg is one of the five founders of TELL. She previously taught Organizational Behavior at Boston University’s School of Management.
All writings in topics are the express property of their authors and are used with permission. For reproduction permission of any of these writings, please e-mail: jan@therapyabuse.org.
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